johnhoustonstockton:

just wanna get rich enough to buy my mom all the shit she deserves 

(via the-undisclosed-location)

the-poe-catcher:

okay Nintendo but consider this: i don’t have money

(via claphne)

viva-la-nostalgia:

If you don’t have a massive alternative universe in your head with developed people and stories you’re lying.

(Source: goreflakes, via gennayyyyyy)

all american family dinner

  • mom: hello son you need to put out the fancy dinner plates. i ordered some Chinese food and we will serve it on the plates so we can pretend i cooked
  • son: of course mom, can u pass me the apple juice
  • mom: of course son. be careful it is very spicy
  • son: *sips juice* OH SUGAR U WERE RIGHT MOM THIS APPLE JUICE IS MUCH TOO SPICY
  • dad: ha ha ha. wash it down with hot dogs, and all american tradition.
  • son: thanks dad. hey, wanna play baseball with me after dinner?
  • dad: we can't tonight, son. tonight is the night we are having our annual family photograph taken
  • mom: i picked out matching sweaters for all of us including the dog.
  • son: we will look great! we should use the photograph as a christmas card! merry christmas from the bakers!
  • dad: great idea, son. don't forget about our fishing trip this weekend
  • son: golly dad, how could i forget that important american family tradition